The Iconoclast Blog #1

It’s been awhile since I’ve written for this series, but life since April 2024 through November 2025 has been an extremely wild ride. Though, while looking through older posts on BlueSky and Aethy I was wondering about my art and all I’ve been through because of it. One particular post I made on BlueSky caught my attention and I was instantly thrown back into my Freshman/Sophomore years at CCS (College For Creative Studies) 

“Stayed up too late going through old files & drawings to make   this chart for Every Original Story I've made. Tears of Iscariot is the most worked on while other stories have been waiting in the queue since High School + College.”

After reading this post, I realized how often I left my stories waiting to be created. Instead of creating them, you know? While in art school, I always jumped from different ideas and stories each semester anxiously. I wanted to be extravagant with my works and go above and beyond with achieving them. Yet by the end of the semester my projects and ideas would fall flat, remain unfinished, and my energy drained down to the point of burnout.

High school was one thing, being a kid with flimsy art goals while watching anime on Toonami and Adult Swim. Daydreaming about making my own anime one day, I would draw and write stories without much fear. I was eager to learn back then because I believed in myself and that with all my emotions and beliefs I had a future with art as a career. Then I started at CCS, got my first art critique--which popped my confidence bubble--and I learned a thing or two about breaking away from the “It’s Just My Art Style” mindset. 

(2010 art)

(artwork from 2014-2015)

It wasn’t until two weeks into my First semester and a conversation with my instructor, Gil Ashby, that I started to grasp what my issue was. It was Perfection. It was as if I had this rule over myself that everything I did in school and in life had to be extraordinary and exceptional. From the Thumbnail Sketches to the Finished Product it all had to be perfect. And of course, nothing ever was. 

Yet post college, I sit here now writing this blog and realize now in my 30’s I am finally slowly learning to break away from perfection. Taking deep breaths to manage my anxiety, acknowledging my perfectionism, and educating myself on where it all stems from; I’ve learned to be patient with my creative process. I allow myself to make mistakes now and fix them later.

And I am grateful to say that I am confident enough to revisit my old stories, revamp them, and use the knowledge I have now to make a finished product. 

Thanks for reading!